The Mouse Roars – Puerto Rico ’08 Primary

Call it a variation of the 15 minutes of fame or a spirited exercise signifying nothing. Puerto Rico is in the bright political spot light on main land USA when it votes for Democratic convention delegates on 1 June 08. This event will surely impact more for Puerto Rico than West Side Story; bring more sustained attention than when Puerto Rican independentistas shot up Harry Truman's congress or when the same organization pulled off the Brinks heist of the century. The bandidos were captured, but the loot was not recovered – nationalists still portray the theft as a Robin Hood caper; stealing from the rich giving to poor.

For starters those Puerto Ricans living on the Island, though since 1917 American citizens, cannot vote in the presidential elections; however their brothers living in the USA may, and their votes are counted in their state aggregate, eventually magically converted to votes in the Electoral College for president. In 1974 a committee in the Democratic Party assigned 55 elected pledged and 7 super delegates to Puerto Rico. It essentially amounted to an invitation to the convention party bashes and effort to establish links in Puerto Rico for the Democratic Party for campaign financing – Puerto Ricans love parties, both political and social. They most certainly understand the linkage between political donations and influence on Capitol Hill. More importantly, are the close commercial links and taxation issues between the Island and mainland.

There is really no Democratic or Republican parties as such that wield power on the island. Instead their two main parties split along ideology: one professes US statehood with the provisos Puerto Rico maintains a separate Olympic team and plays independently in global beauty contests; and the other like things politically as they are: i.e., no federal taxes, roughly 17 billion in federal aid with participation in US food, education and social programs. There are more paid work holidays than any where else in the world. There is a mandated by law Christmas bonus amounting up to $450. There is also an independence party that makes noise, but barely survives legally as a party, but it serves as a reservoir of furious national identity and cultural pride.

Puerto Rico is almost a social democracy – about 33% of the population works for the government opposed to 16% in the US. The Electric Power and Water & Sewer companies are owned by the central government as well as national lotteries – this year the government predicts a one and half billion dollar budget short fall. To muddle the local government even more is that the current Governor Acevedo Vilá, a committed Obama super delegate, is under federal indictment for campaign financing irregularities. This was the same guy that told Michele Obama on a recent visit to his office that Puerto Ricans are Puerto Ricans first and Americans second. The final surrealistic twist is that incarcerated criminals have the right to vote in elections.

So these are some facts on the ground that should make American voters cringe as Bill's wife tries to count the Puerto Rican Island votes, both popular and delegate, as meaningful in the US electoral process.

Hillary believes she has great popularity in Puerto Rico as the senator from New York. Her husband granted amnesty to jailed Puerto Rican Independentistas when he was President and when she was getting ready to run for the senate from NY. She may have miscalculated an islander’s respect for New Yorkers, especially Puerto Ricans from NYC – locals call them Newyoricans and look down on them as culturally inferior, with their Spanglish and Bronx accents.

Puerto Ricans like women in high heels and short tight skirts – Bill's wife sitting on a folding metal chair on stage like a lump, in a drab pants suit contrasts sharply with slim Obama prancing to salsa music at the head of street parade in Old San Juan. This whole event is theatrical – more a fiesta than politically significant. It cost the Puerto Rican government 2.5 million to put the show on. Its results will have no impact on the Democratic convention.

Apart from these issues Bill's wife creepy fixation on assassination as a reason to continue her campaign casts her as Lady Macbeth or Lucrezia Borgia .

Puerto Rico is for Puerto Ricans... Their soldiers die in wars for the US (88 KIA in Bush's wars so far), but it resists being cast as Norte Americanos – at the latest plebiscite they were given two choices by the US – Statehood or Independence. Rather than make a choice, they wrote in NONE OF THE ABOVE. Puerto Ricans do everything with exuberance and panache except work – there is a form of controlled, low grade anarchy there. The more I observe it, the better I like it. Keep it a secret – do not tell a soul or a misguided official will try to fix it. Colonal Robert E Bartos USA Ret.

* Photograph: Linocut titled Huracán del norte (Hurricane From the North) by Carlos R. Rivera